Kindergarten Troubles

As many of you know and experience first hand, our son is quite the active kid. That's putting it mildly. While we love that about him (and wish to bottle up the energy and make millions), it makes it challenging as a parent. Add strong willed. Add high intellect. And cute! We're in for it for sure.

The past 2 plus years, we've been dealing with behavioral issues in the classroom in addition to at home. When he was in daycare/preschool last year when he was 4, the issues were at the height of awful. Refusal to listen to adults. Impulsive. "Intelligent but socially and emotionally immature." Hitting. Tantrums. Manipulative. Wild. And it goes on. Sounded a lot like me when I was a kid. And I also loved blaming his biologic contributor, because inherent douchery reigns through DNA. We thought he was acting out of boredom because he learns things so fast. We were hoping kindergarten would give him the stimuli and structure to keep his attention.

And it did. For a little bit.

Around October, his teacher voiced concerns about his behavior. He sits at a desk by himself because he can't sit with others without being all over the place. He is not allowed to have certain school supplies at his desk because he uses them inappropriately. He rarely walks, its usually a sprint. He does not shut up. She said talk to his pediatrician. I talk to his pediatrician, he says have her call me. Due to miscommunication, that doesn't happen.

I didn't really want to get his pediatrician involved. While his behavior is not acceptable (and believe me, we are not the parents that let our kid rule the roost), it wasn't everyday. In my mind, means that there isn't anything diagnosable wrong because I am convinced that's who he is. I see so much of myself in him and I turned out ok, right? Isn't he too young? Not to mention my soap box of "not every kid has something wrong with them, let's chill out on slapping meds on kids here". (that's another lecture I like to call "Society and the Pharmaceutical Band-Aid")

Then last week, he gets kicked off the bus for 3 days for not sitting in the seat, screaming for no reason, kicking the window, and not listening to the bus driver. That was a real eye opener for us. Not only is his bus behavior unsafe, it also causes quite a dent in my sleeping if I have to drop him off and pick him up.

Now before you say anything-- We absolutely talk to him about his behavior. We've tried almost discipline method under the sun. We've tried reward systems in which he's manipulated and/or doesn't care about. Of course we spank him. All of this doesn't work. Doesn't mean we don't do them, but it doesn't change anything.

I finally broke down and actually looked up ADHD. What the DSM criteria is. Jordan meets them all. Every single one. I called his pediatrician. Pediatrician talked to his teacher. We're now in the process of evaluation for a diagnosis. It pains me greatly. Not at the possibility of something "being wrong with him". Of the label. Of the medication and side effects (especially that). Of what if we're wrong. What if this doesn't work.

I greatly despise the label of ADHD because it seems like every kid is on Ritalin or stimulants of some sort. The stories I've heard of all the bad stuff like parents using ADHD meds to improve their kids focus during sports(of course we would not do that); pediatricians not properly evaluating their patients; teachers pushing for medications for their students. I am completely jaded, still am, and probably always will be.  But I'm trying really hard to push that aside because this is what he needs. I'm scared on what this means but we want our son to be successful. I hope this all leads to a better road for Jordan.